God I can't wait to have my phone textbombed every night
Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize