aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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