Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
one of my coworkers asked me if I was PMSing today...... excuse me sir, but it is none of your business as to what my uterus is or is not doing right now. fucker.
and yea, I'm PMSing.
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
Randomize
