nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Randomize
