pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
I just ate a drumstick out of the garbage. I need a life coach.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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