Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
he laminated a picture of his dick.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
Randomize
