Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT!
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
Randomize