planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
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