i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
Randomize
