I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
it's like heaven, but drunker
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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