i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
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