Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
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