New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
I am watching Grease 2 and properly learning how to apply a condom to a banana. This is a sign from God that this is the closest I will ever get to having the need for one.
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
Randomize