"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
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