its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
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