Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
She left a cookie cake on my porch, and the frosting reads "I'm sorry". She left me an I'm-sorry-for-punching-you-in-the-face cake.
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