Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
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