She's JV to your varsity
Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
I'm like a savant for remembering names I learned while I was drunk. Seriously, I'm three for three. I'm on a roll.
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
There should be a company that sends nadgrams. They're like candy grams except the recipient gets kicked in the balls.
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
Randomize
