how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
I can't believe I forgot to wish you a happy 13 week-iversary of the time you raw-dogged a rando. Only two days late, so it still counts. And since your 14 weeks is coming up, you should know that at 14 weeks your baby can squint, frown, grimace, pee, and possibly suck his/her/their/zir thumb!
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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