Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.