i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"