It's Friday. Sex?
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
Well I just put wine in my tea
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
I bought him flowers and fake vampire fangs, cuz there's really not a greeting card that says "Sorry I got wasted last night and started a very sloppy bloodletting ritual.".
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