Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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