we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
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