youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
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