dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
So I have $4.22 in my bank account, just wrote a check for a tooth brush from quikmart, and bought a 25 cent condom from the bathroom. i don't know whats more sad, my bank account or the fact that i'm entrusting my entire future to a condom machine that was probably last filled in 1970
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
Welp. It's confirmed. There is literally no lube on this entire island. Fuck me. More accurately, don't fuck me.
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
Randomize