If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
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The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
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