that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
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