In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
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