At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
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