I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
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