I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
I'm officially "accidentally set myself on fire" drunk
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
