White coat. Heels.
Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
Randomize
