I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
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