hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
Randomize
