We're facebook friends in real life
where am i from again
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
