is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
