let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
A guy from tinder a while ago who sent me dick pics straight out the gate is a tech on my dad's hospital floor. I was wondering why he looked familiar and why he never took my dads vitals when I was in the room
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
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