So drunk its hurt
Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
I'm having to shit out rocks
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
Randomize
