either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
My vagina is officially offended.
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
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