I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
Let's get the cat blown out
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
Randomize
