I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
Randomize
