I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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