I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
Randomize
