You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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