ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
Randomize
