I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
i had a dream last night that you and i organized a foursome. swear to god
ps i'll be in miami in early july. this text has no relation to the last one
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
After I tried for five minutes to hang my beer from the coat hanger in the bathroom , I have realized I am drunk
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
