he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
tequila makes me forget i have legs
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
I have been drinking at the bar so long today that I literally just found a spiderweb from my leg to the bar.
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies.
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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