I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
Dude you make losing your phone an art. You left it balancing on a two liter bottle in the kitchen. Wtf
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
