tell your sister to shave her snatch
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
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